Two Truths that are Self-Evident: The GOP Craptacular

Truth #1: Huckabee is a lying, out of it, religious wacko. By his own creed, he is going to burn.

A. Liar: After forcing the Arkansas parole board to free a convicted rapist (who the would be President suggested was 'innocent') to only have that man go on and rape and kill, even though Huck was extensively warned that he would, Huck has the audacity to deny a role in the whole thing. Fortunately, there are not only witnesses coming forward, but documentary evidence as well. Read for yourself.

Hey Huck, you're the former minister who claims that faith is your life. See: Bible, #21. "Neither shalt thou bear false witness against thy neighbor."

Lying is distinctly un-dudish in the House of God.

B. Out of it: The Iran NEI was released on Monday morning. On Tuesday night Huckabee was asked about it and knew nothing about it. Sorry chumpskin, you can't be President if you aren't even aware of the most important national security document of the month, if not the year, two days after it came out. In this, you resemble Grampa Fred who consistently states, "I have no opinion on that" for about half of the issues relevant in this election.

C. Insane:

He believes that Gay Marraige would destroy western civilization (which is clearly explains the Muslim conspiracy to legalize Gay marraige in the US as that would be a more effective method to destroy the evil, evil west!)

The money quote: "There's never been a civilization that has rewritten what marriage and family means and survived."

He claims God is the reason why he has risen in the polls:

"There is only one explanation for it, and it is not a human one."

He doesn't believe in evolution or other forms of modern science. And wants public high schools to teach "alternative views" for the origin of man (i.e. Baptist 4,000 year old earth version, aka, total horseshit). Sorry Mr. Stain on American Culture, we've been down that road before and it essentially led to a complete ridicule and end to your way of thinking.

He's opposed to abortion but has no problem with torture. (You know, because the lives of the unborn are more valuable than, say, the average turban wearing terrorist, right?)

His religion only goes one way (the Baptist, bible-thumpin' way! Hell fires and harlots! Y'all gonna burn unless ya' git you down to that thar church and start 'a prayin' for forgivness! Amen! Father God! Specially them Satan lovin' Mormins! Save us Father God from them cultists in Salt Lake City!)

Truth #2: Romney is in favor of a Muslim President

From his speech yesterday:

"A person should not be elected because of his faith nor should he be rejected because of his faith. "

"Religious tolerance would be a shallow principle indeed if it were reserved only for faiths with which we agree. "

"No candidate should become the spokesman for his faith. For if he becomes President he will need the prayers of the people of all faiths."

"And in every faith I have come to know, there are features I wish were in my own: I love the profound ceremony of the Catholic Mass...and the commitment to frequent prayer of the Muslims."

Etc.

So, why hasn't some enterprising young reporter asked, "Mr. Romney, given your speech on religion, would you support a Muslim candidate for President?"

(His answer would obviously be no.)

He also thinks that Religion is a pre-requisite to Freedom (which is freaking scary if you think about it):

"Freedom requires religion just as religion requires freedom. Freedom opens the windows of the soul so that man can discover his most profound beliefs and commune with God. Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone."

Either way, I'd say his speech is controversial for what I have highlighted and NOT because of the Mormon thing. I mean, the fact of the matter is, only the GOP's bigoted core has a problem with his religion. I think they'd have an even bigger problem with him advocating the right for a Muslim to be President.

....

Add it all up and the top-3 GOP candidates have the following scandals:

1. Sex-On-the-City Guiliani - Using city funds to shuttle his mistress around for sex romps (among numerous other scandals and divorces).
2. Flip-Flop, Pro-Muslim President Mitt - Fatally flawed Mormon, illegal immigrant employing, pro-Muslim
3. God's Choice Huck - Delusions of granduer, a fundamental disbelief in basic science, releaser of serial rapist/murderer, completely out of it on all relevant issues

Enjoy those polls GOPers!

(The above is obviously to some extent, tongue in cheek. For example, I have absolutely no problem voting for a Muslim. But I know that the "Fear of a Muslim Planet" has replaced GOP public enemy number one of late ["Fear of a Black Planet"] and it is nice to drive a stake through the GOP's radicalism. That being said, let's hope this election cycle is much like 1932 - the year which was the death knell for GOP politics and caused a major realignment in the US. We could use an end to Theocratic Democracy and maybe, just maybe, this will be the election that signals the beginning of the end.)