Thoughts on my future

I have given a lot of thought to my future. It's always in my mind, as one could imagine. I believe, at long last, I have a tentative plan that makes some sense.

Step 1

The first thing on my mind is applying for jobs here in the UK. I have already applied for a position at Amnesty International and I have about 20 political consulting firms that I am ready to apply for (once I get my CV squared away). I'm doing some networking as well, so I'm constantly on the prowl for new opportunities. I'm fairly certain I don't want to simply work in business. I'm motivated and interested in policy issues, so that's where my focus is. Whether it's human rights, security issues, or development - my focus is the same. I am old enough and experienced enough to know that I'm not going to be happy unless I feel like I'm making a contribution to the world in ways that I feel comfortable with. Simple business won't achieve that for me.

My timetable for this process is basically the end of October. I do not want to stick around in a temp position doing shite work indefinitely. If I don't find employment to my liking by that point, then it will be time to throw in the towel and return to the US. However, if I have solid leads or chances, then I will get the BUNAC visa which would enable me to stay for 6 additional months on a work permit. If I don't have any tangible leads, then that's that.

Step 2

Looking for work in the US is a concurrent step. I'm not really wanting to be in the position of returning to the US and having to take temp work while I look for a permanent job. Therefore, I have feelers out and I'm scanning the internet sites for jobs to my liking. I have what looks to be a very good contact here who worked for the Senate for four years and he has stated that he would be willing to contact his people there on my behalf. I believe I could get an interview out of that at the least. Not only that, I have some companies in mind that do the type of work I'm interested in. The point is, if/when I return to the US, I want to have good leads so that I can spend a minimal amount of time temping to make do. I've tempted enough for my liking.

Step 3

This is the wild card that's been bouncing around my brain for quite some time: PhD school. I've looked at a few programs in the US and abroad and it's basically a lot easier to do it in the US for the simple reason that if I go this route, I'm not going to pay for it. I had to pay for this MA largely because I was such a lazy and unfocused student as an undergrad. But I've paid my dues here. I've worked hard, I've improved as a scholar and writer, and most notably, my confidence is sky high. I know that I could be successful in a PhD program, if I choose that route. That being said, I'm not going to just any PhD program. If I do get a PhD in International Relations (or Political Science), it's going to be at a top school. So, tentatively, my plan is to apply for a few top programs in December and see what happens. If I get in somewhere, then I can make a choice. If I don't, then I know that option is not available to me.

I'm a big believer that in life, sometimes bad things happen for the right reasons. Whether we like it or not, the challenge is to see what can be gained out of change. For example, I'm here in London, pursuing my dreams, and ultimately enjoying one of the best years of my life because of life changes that were ultimately out of my control. While the outcome of those changes did nothing to ease the pain at the time, sometimes life's like this. You look back years later and say, "Yeah, now I get it." I don't know if it's fate, a higher power, or random chance, but sometimes people need a kick in the ass to get them moving on the path that's right for them.

This is why I'm genuinely not sweating things right now. I have confidence that, just like moving to London, things are going to work out. Whether I become a high level political operative, a strong advocate for improving the human condition, or the mad professor, I am confident that I will be happy because I know that for the first time in my life, I'm on the path that's right for me. The last few years of my life remind me of what Morpheus told Neo which I'll poorly paraphrase here, "...there's a difference between knowing the path and walking the path." At long last, my life is starting to make sense.